Your Anxiety Is Actually Controlling Your Life

Your Anxiety Is Actually Controlling Your Life

Hello loves, ❤

Anyone who suffers from excess anxiety or an anxiety disorder knows that anxiety is strange in how it manifests in daily life. It’s beyond reason or logic, and just, in general, makes no sense. It is also super sneaky. For those blessed with anxiety like myself, a lot of times it feels more in control than it is until it doesn’t. If we aren’t mindful or aware of how anxiety is affecting us in the present moment, it’s easy for it to kind of work its way onto the main stage and then jump out and yell,”Surprise, I’m here!”

As a recovering agoraphobic, I’ve learned over time that looking for and being aware of warning signs that anxiety is becoming increasingly invasive can spare a lot of distress in the long run. By looking for certain red flags, anxiety controlling thoughts and other feelings can be caught early and reeled in before becoming a bigger problem that starts directing major or even minor life choices. The following 5 signs can be reliable indicators that anxiety is playing more of a part of your life than it needs to:

1. You avoid too many things you know you shouldn’t.

Avoidance is probably the most clear-cut indication that anxiety is playing a large role in your life. Fear induces a fight, flight, or freeze response that – for an individual who doesn’t experience excess anxiety – enhances the ability to cope with a given situation. However, for those of us that do live with excess anxiety, it can paralyze us, cause us to run from a frightening situation, or even cause a panic attack. So you then start avoiding that coffee shop that you and your ex used to frequent. Or you avoid calling your overbearing mother back. Or you avoid checking your email so you don’t have to subject yourself to whatever hell may have broken loose at work. You suddenly realize you avoid a lot of things. You realize your anxiety has gained the power necessary to control where you go and what you do.

2. You worry too much about everything.

Some worry is good. If you didn’t care about anything, you wouldn’t pay your bills, you’d look like complete garbage, and you’d probably starve. It’s important to worry about the right things in the right amounts. But when the worry takes on a mind of its own, things get a little dicier. Anxiety is a funny thing in that it feeds off of itself. The more the worry runs wild, the more out of control it will feel. So when the focus of the worry shifts from normal things in normal amounts to worrying night and day about – for example – whether you’re capable enough or are just a living example of imposter syndrome, or whether you’ll find a stable career that doesn’t suck the soul out of you, or whether you’re actually deserving of the healthy, non-toxic love of another quality human being, the worry just starts to take on a life of its own and become a controlling force in your life.

3. You think about the future too much.

It was the Chinese philosopher Laozi who graced us with the quote, ”If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.” When anxiety starts to take control of our thoughts, we start to think more about where we will be tomorrow and less about where are right now. Rather than focusing on the fact that you’re currently on the couch with your significant other and enjoying time together watching your favorite show on Netflix, you’re focusing constantly on what needs to be done to prepare for tomorrow’s meeting, or what laundry still needs to be done, or what you need to do to prepare your breakfast for tomorrow morning. When we start thinking these thoughts all of the time, it exhausts us and keeps us feeling continuously anxious.

4. Your anxiety stops you from chasing what you want.

For those of us with anxiety, our minds seem to throw out a constant stream of what I like to call ”what ifs,” or thoughts that focus on future outcomes of events that haven’t even happened yet. These will make the world seem like a scary place. You want to quit your job and work as a freelance writer? But what if you can’t make enough money and pay your bills? Or you want to take a trip to Thailand but you’d have to go alone since none of your friends can go? But what if something bad were to happen? What if you can’t handle such a substantial adventure and wind up lost and alone somewhere? Catastrophizing is the name of the game with ”what ifs”. These thoughts oftentimes lead to self-sabotage and prevent us from living the life we deep down want to live.

5. You notice your anxiety make you feel like less than you are.

This can be the most draining piece for someone with anxiety. While we know it shouldn’t, anxiety can sometimes cause our self-esteem to take a hit. It makes you doubt whether or not you’re capable of handling whatever you face. It can make the uncertainty of the future feel like it’s working against you. It can make you feel like everyone else has such a handle on life when you subjectively struggle on the daily with trying to keep your fear in check. Most days this intense self-doubt isn’t a problem, but when it starts to appear more and more frequently, it’s a sign that anxiety is not only taking over our thoughts but our self-perception as well. When we start to feel that anxiety defines who we are as a person, that’s a sign that anxiety has taken on a much more dominant role in our lives than it needs to.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

76,000 Views, Yay!

everyone else is already taken

Hello loves, ❤

Happy Monday 🙂 It’s Monday here in Sydney, Australia. How was everyones weekend?

I had a Harry Potter marathon – It was the most amazing thing EVER! I’ve never seen the films so I was very excited to watch them. I was so surprised at how intrigued I got & how involved I got watching them.

Have any of you lovely people ever watched Harry Potter?

I have just gotten home from the gym AND.. I have to admit, I am thinking of changing my workout time as they we were just WAAAY TOO MANY people tonight for my liking, I missed out on a fair few exercises as there were people using the equipment.

I already wake up very early to go to work so to now wake up even earlier for the gym may be very difficult.

Anyways, by the title, you all know why we are here – Putting another 1000 views into the bag. 76,000 VIEWS! GOODNESS ME! I cannot believe it!

Thank you to all the lovely people that have re-blogged by work:

I am so grateful for all your love & support ❤ It truly motivates me, you have no idea.

I hope everyone has a lovely week ❤

I am so excited, my course starts this week on 10th May, if you’ve missed me explaining this course, you can find the Mindful Bootcamp blog post here.

I am so excited, but I am nervous. I am happy but also scared.

I’ll most certainly let you all know on Friday how my Thursday night went, so be sure to stay tuned for a post ❤

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

The Inside My Head Tag

Hello loves, ❤

The 'inside my head' tag

Another little tag that I’ve created – Hope you all like this ❤

Rules:

  • Thank & tag the person that has tagged you
  • Attach the tag photo
  • Answers the ‘This or THAT questions
  • Tag a 10-20 friends.

HERE WE GO:

  • How do I feel at the moment?
    • I feel a little deflated & unmotivated – i hope to be more energised.
  • What do I need more in my life?
    • CALM! Certainly, can say that, hands down. I know for a fact I need more calm in my life. I am constantly on edge, stressing out, whinging, whining. complaining.
  • What would make me happy right now?
    • A nice mini holiday, just a few days away somewhere relaxing, secluded & away from the world.
  • What is going right in my life?
    • I feel that my blog is most certainly one of the things that are going well in my life at the moment, we just hit 2 YEARS, so I am so excited to see where my blog is going to take me ❤
  • What am I most grateful for? List 10 things.
    • My family ❤ (They are very loving)
    • My friends ❤ (They are so supportive)
    • My health (I am grateful I can move)
    • My job (I work in a fun, uplifting environment)
    • My car (It gets me form A to B)
    • My house (It gives me a roof over my head)
    • My food in my house (This feeds me & fuels my body)
    • My gym membership (This gives me the ability to work out & exercise my body)
    • My shoes (They move me about & protect me)
    • My blog (It has connected me with all you lovely people)
  • When did I experience joy this week?
    • I got to experience joy when I purchased new pens & markers for my bullet journal (Yes, I will do a post on that soon)
  • List a small victory/success?
    • Going on an airplane for the first time (MY FEAR)
    • Catching elevators up & down my office for work (MY FEAR)
  • What is bothering me & why?
    • The FUTURE! Why? Bc I am a big ball of anxiousness! I am so scared of the future & what it will bring.
  • What are my priorities at the moment?
    • My physical & mental health & anxiety.
  • What do I love about my self?
    • That I care a lot about the ones I love ❤
  • Who means the world to me & why?
    • My family & friends ❤ They have been there for me through thick & thin. They see the RAW side of me when it comes to my anxiety & having their support is so inspiring ❤
  • If I could share one message with the world, what would it be?
    • Life is fragile, love the people around  you ❤
  • What advice would I give to my younger self?
    • The popularity doesn’t matter bc after school, these people won’t be your friends.
  • What lesson did I learn this week?
    • I COME FIRST. No one else. How can I help others if I can’t even help myself.
  • If I had all the time in the world, what would I do first?
    • Focus on my anxiety, focus on my physical & mental health ❤
  • Whats draining my energy?
    • Overthinking.. AS IT ALWAYS DOES!
  • What does my ideal morning look like?
    • Weekday morning: wake up, toilet, brush teeth, wash face, moisturise, put make up on, get dressed for work, pack lunch & leave the house.
    • Weekend morning: wake up, open blinds straight away, wash sheets, toilet, brush teeth, wash face, moisturise, eat breakfast outside.
  • What does my ideal day look like?
    • Weekday: wake up, drive to the train station, catch train to work, work all day, catch train home, go to the gym, come home, shower, eat & sleep.
    • Weekend: wake up, wash sheets, eat breakfast, go to the gym, plan something fun to do.
  • What makes me come alive?
    • A good book, blogging, a manicure, a massage, cupping remedy – All these things make my soul happy ❤
  • What/who inspires me the most?
    • My parents & my close friends – We are all battling our own war & to see how inspiring others are is really motivating for me ❤
  • Where does my pain originate?
    • ANXIETY – My pain starts there. It ends there. Its always there. WOW. That was very Negative Nancy of me. But it’s true.
  • What are my strengths?
    • Supportive
    • Kind
    • Determined
    • Committed
  • What is something I’ve always wanted but too scared to get?
    • A PLANE TICKET TO EUROPE.. )possibly one way, ha!)
  • What is something I would love to learn?
    • I would love to learn more about being independent & traveling independent also.
  • Where would I want to live my ideal life?
    • Oo, this part of me is SO hard. Ha! I truly see myself in 12987540346 different places. A little cottage in the woods, a big white castle in Mykonos, Greece, somewhere on an island with no phone service.
  • Where would I like to travel in the next 5 years?
    • Croatia
    • Denmark
    • France
    • Germany
    • Greece
    • Italy
    • Switzerland
    • Vatican City
  • What can I do to take better care of myself?
    • Create routines & stick to them (I’ll be doing a morning routine soon & a night time routine soon)
  • What hobbies would I like to try?
    • I would love to bike ride more, I don’t do it enough.
    • I also want to be more consistent with my bullet journalling
  • When have I done something that I thought I couldn’t do?
    • Getting on a plane – When diagnosed with anxiety, I would’t imagine EVER getting on a plane. I said to my self I would never do it! AND… I did it! In Feb 2017, & I am so proud of myself for doing so.
  • At the end of my life, what do I want my legacy to be?
    • I want to be remembered as a caring wife, loving mother & a hard worker.

MY NOMINEES:

 

I can’t wait to see your reply blogs ❤

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

Attending Mindful Bootcamp

Hello loves, ❤

I pray you are all doing well.

I wanted to address something within this blog post, I received an email from someone who would like to remain anonymous – She asked me how did I overcome my anxiety bc my life seems so great (as she follows me on instagram) & all my blog posts are so uplifting, she has also asked for tips & tricks on how to conquer anxiety.

I need to pop this bubble now

I need to address this NOW.

I am not perfect, my life is not perfect, my days are not perfect, my mindset is not perfect, my anxiety is not perfect.

Please remember that I like to share blogs that uplift people, help others who are struggling & help my followers see light at the end of the tunnel.

I never intended in making a blog site that was filled with ‘I hate my life, I hate anxiety, I had a crap day, I hate everyone & everything’

I go through a lot on my end, for example, I am recovering from a tough weekend both mentally & physically at this very point in time.

I have had a very anxious weekend that was filled with panic attacks & an episode of vertigo. (If you have ever had vertigo, you will understand my pain).

Sometimes I have GREAT days but then sometimes I have BAD days – And, that is the beauty of anxiety, you never know what sort of day you are going to have.

Please don’t think bc of what you see on my instagram that I have a ‘perfect’ life. A lot of people will not portray negativity of their instagrams or blogs for that matter. You never know what is going on behind closed doors for someone.

Just know, I have had anxiety for the last 4 years & I know that there is no ‘CURE” for anxiety but learning how to live with it & control it.

I am looking into ways of learning how to control my anxiety for the rest of my life.

I have just paid for an anxiety course that starts on 10/05/2018, called Mindful Bootcamp.

I am SO excited for this ❤

The course is broken out into Thursday night classes for 4 weeks, the classes get broken into the below:

Week 1. 
Self Concept/Esteem & Confidence
(Knowledge, Understanding, Development)

Week 2.
Stress, Anxiety & Depression
(Key Triggers, Feelings, Rationality)

Week 3.
Anger, Conflict & Resolution
(Key Triggers, Emotions, Control)

Week 4.
Habits, Patterns & Behaviours
(Thoughts, Actions, Consequences)

I  am excited to share this with you, bc I am all about learning new things & sharing them with my lovely followers ❤

So please understand when I say, my life is not PERFECT & that I struggle just like the next person. I try not to look at life so negativity & I know for a fact that I don’t want to portray my anxiety onto my blog.

I love you all to the moon & back & want to thank you for your support, guidance, love & inspiration. It’s bc of all you lovely people that I do see light at the end of the tunnel, you all help me see the light ❤

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature