When You Feel Like You Are Falling Behind

SSENTIALs

Hello loves, ❤

1. There is no time limit on when you can find love or reach success. You have an entire lifetime to reach the goals you set for yourself.

2. Just because your friends have reached certain milestones by now does not mean you were supposed to do the same. Their answer to happiness is not necessarily the same as yours.

3. You are allowed to move at your own pace. You are allowed to take your time. You are allowed to crawl instead of run.

4. There are no shortcuts toward success. You have to choose the hard road, because the easy one will not get you exactly where you were aiming to land.

5. No one else is judging you as harshly as you have been judging yourself. It’s true that you are your own worst critic.

6. You might not be ahead of your competition yet, but you are ahead of the person you were five years ago.

7. Do not rush toward your future and forget to cherish your present. Enjoy every moment for what it’s worth.

8. You are still young and have plenty of time to chase after your dreams. You do not have to hurry.

9. Never give up. Never stop believing in yourself.

10. Failing once does not mean you are going to fail every other time you try. Practice leads to perfection.

11. You cannot compare journeys, because no two people are the same.

12. Your parents might have accomplished a lot by your current age, but the world is much different now than when they were younger.

13. You should be proud of everything you have, not bitter about what you still haven’t earned.

14. Nothing happens overnight. You are not going to wake up one morning, magically transported into the life you have always wanted.

15. Everything worthwhile takes time. Passion. Dedication.

16. Don’t let your impatience convince you that your dreams are out of your reach. You will achieve every goal as long as you keep going.

17. You always have enough time to change paths if you feel like a different direction would make you happier. You are not stuck in this same space forever.

18. Marriage and millions in the bank is not everyone’s idea of success.

19. Your pessimism is holding you back from greatness. It is convincing you to remain inside of your comfort zone.

20. When you stop doubting yourself, you will find yourself achieving more.

21. Your success might take longer to reach, but it might also last for longer.

22. If you give up now, you will never forgive yourself. You will always have what ifs. 

23. Stop selling yourself short, stop making excuses, and stop treating yourself as a burden.

24. You are better than you have been telling yourself.

25. If you want something, you are eventually going to get it.

26. Success is always a possibility.

27. You can do this — as long as you put your heart and soul into it.

28. You are good enough.

29. As long as you are putting effort into accomplishing your goals, you should not be disappointed in yourself.

30. You are not falling behind. You are doing fine.

 

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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I Want To Be A Better Person

I Want To Be A Better Person

Hello loves, ❤

I want to be the kind of person who lets go of grudges instead of holding onto anger for years and letting it tear me apart. I want to be able to forgive. I want to be able to move past the crappy things that have happened in my past. I want to drop my baggage and move forward into my future. 

I want to be the kind of person who always looks on the bright side instead of assuming everything is going to fall apart eventually. I hate how I expect the worst. I want to remain optimistic. I want to believe good things are bound to happen. I want to be excited about tomorrow instead of dreading what might go down.

I want to be the kind of person who can strike up a conversation with anyone anywhere instead of having trouble forming complete sentences in group settings. I want to be able to socialize without getting butterflies caught in my stomach. I want to put myself out there without freaking out about what other people might say about me. 

I want to be the kind of person who gives without expecting anything in return instead of continuing my selfish streak. I want to spread love. I want to encourage peace. I want to feel good about doing good instead of only caring about myself. 

I want to be the kind of person who is overflowing with confidence instead of thinking so low of myself. I want to love the person staring back in the mirror. I want to hold my head high. I want to believe I can accomplish anything. I want to believe that I am worthy of love and success.

I want to be the kind of person who congratulates other people on their accomplishments instead of secretly seething with jealousy because in my mind, anyone who accomplishes their dreams is doing better than me. Because I turn every little thing into a competition and start moping when I’m not the one in the spotlight. 

I want to be the kind of person who is willing to take chances instead of attempting to blend into the background. I want to forward my career. I want to take risks for love. I want to find my courage and take steps forward instead of remaining stuck in the same place. 

I want to be the kind of person who goes out of the way to help others instead of turning down invitations out of inconvenience. I want my loved ones to feel like they can always rely on me. I want them to trust that I will be there for them, no matter what time of night they need me.

I want to be the kind of person who has faith things are going to get better instead of being such a skeptic. I want to see the beauty in this world. I want to appreciate every moment of my existence.

I want to be a better person — and I am actively trying to change myself every single day. I am trying to make myself proud.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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Calm Yourself Down

desert CAMPING

Hello loves, ❤

Overthinking doesn’t sound so bad on the surface — thinking is good, right?

But overthinking can cause problems.

When you overthink, your judgments get cloudy and your stress gets elevated. You spend too much time in the negative. It can become difficult to act.

If this feels like familiar territory to you, here are 10 simple ideas to free yourself from overthinking.

1. Awareness is the beginning of change.

Before you can begin to address or cope with your habit of overthinking, you need to learn to be aware of it when it’s happening. Any time you find yourself doubting or feeling stressed or anxious, step back and look at the situation and how you’re responding. In that moment of awareness is the seed of the change you want to make.

2. Don’t think of what can go wrong, but what can go right.

In many cases, overthinking is caused by a single emotion: fear. When you focus on all the negative things that might happen, it’s easy to become paralyzed. Next time you sense that you starting to spiral in that direction, stop. Visualize all the things that can go right and keep those thoughts present and up front.

3. Distract yourself into happiness.

Sometimes it’s helpful to have a way to distract yourself with happy, positive, healthy alternatives. Things like mediation, dancing, exercise, learning an instrument, knitting, drawing, and painting can distance you from the issues enough to shut down the overanalysis.

4. Put things into perspective.

It’s always easy to make things bigger and more negative than they need to be. The next time you catch yourself making a mountain out of a molehill, ask yourself how much it will matter in five years. Or, for that matter, next month. Just this simple question, changing up the time frame, can help shut down overthinking.

5. Stop waiting for perfection.

This is a big one. For all of us who are waiting for perfection, we can stop waiting right now. Being ambitious is great but aiming for perfection is unrealistic, impractical, and debilitating. The moment you start thinking “This needs to be perfect” is the moment you need to remind yourself, “Waiting for perfect is never as smart as making progress.”

6. Change your view of fear.

Whether you’re afraid because you’ve failed in the past, or you’re fearful of trying or overgeneralizing some other failure, remember that just because things did not work out before does not mean that has to be the outcome every time. Remember, every opportunity is a new beginning, a place to start again.

7. Put a timer to work.

Give yourself a boundary. Set a timer for five minutes and give yourself that time to think, worry, and analyze. Once the timer goes off, spend 10 minutes with a pen and paper, writing down all the things that are worrying you, stressing you, or giving you anxiety. Let it rip. When the 10 minutes is up, throw the paper out and move on — preferably to something fun.

8. Realize you can’t predict the future.

No one can predict the future; all we have is now. If you spend the present moment worrying about the future, you are robbing yourself of your time now. Spending time on the future is simply not productive. Spend that time instead on things that give you joy.

9. Accept your best.

The fear that grounds overthinking is often based in feeling that you aren’t good enough — not smart enough or hardworking enough or dedicated enough. Once you’ve given an effort your best, accept it as such and know that, while success may depend in part on some things you can’t control, you’ve done what you could do.

Overthinking is something that can happen to anyone. But if you have a great system for dealing with it you can at least ward off some of the negative, anxious, stressful thinking and turn it into something useful, productive, and effective.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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Self-Care Means Committing To Doing These Things

Self-Care Means Committing To Doing These Things

Hello loves, ❤

If there’s one thing most of us are too busy to think about, it’s self-care. 

Self-care is just as it sounds; it’s taking care of yourself. That includes all aspects of yourself. Your mental, physical, emotional, recreational, and professional well-being is all part of self-care. In order for you to care for yourself, you have to consider what areas of yourself need the most attention, and how to show them love in the first place.

When it comes to self-care, these are what I have found to be the most important tips for loving yourself, staying healthy, and building a life you enjoy.

1. Prioritize Alone Time

Spending time with people you love is important, but so is spending time with yourself. Alone time helps you stay in tune with your thoughts, your goals, your interests, and what you need. Far too often we allow ourselves to become wrapped up in our daily hustle, our social lives, or other people’s needs, allowing ourselves to completely forget quiet time with just yourself.

Carve out some time every day to do something you enjoy, on your own. Maybe it’s going for a walk, reading a few chapters of a book, knitting a sweater, or baking some cookies. Whatever it may be, let yourself do it on your own. Spending time with yourself will help you develop a sense of self-love and care.

2. Put Good Stuff in Your Body

The saying “you are what you eat” is undeniably true. When you eat crap, you feel like crap. So while “treating yourself” is great, fuelling your body with healthy foods is more important. The right food will make you feel energized, help with your hair and skin, and even cure insomnia. In fact, a tall glass of cold water has been known to be more effective at waking you up than a cup of coffee.

You’re definitely not ruining your self-care routine if you decide to pig out on some cake or coffee. Obviously, it’s all about moderation… But prioritizing a healthy diet is one way of taking care of yourself that ends up affecting nearly every aspect of your wellbeing, from your mental health to your physical health.

3. Get Good Sleep

Sleep is one of the most important aspects self-care, however, it’s often the most forgotten. Sleep allows your body to recharge and reset. A good sleep sets the tone for the rest of the day ahead of you. Without a good night’s sleep, it’s only natural that you feel groggy, irritable, and overemotional. In many cases, poor sleep can trigger anxiety, depression, and panic attacks.

Treating yourself to great sleep is vital for an effective self-care routine. When you take care of yourself through sleep, you set yourself up for a better day that can be focused on other aspects of your wellbeing. Set your alarms and try to get your full 8 hours… And if you can, try not to over, or under sleep. Both are risky business.

4. Organize Your Finances

Like I said, self-care isn’t always pretty. And it definitely isn’t always exciting. But whether you realize it or not, taking care of your finances is part of taking care of yourself. Money, or finances in general, are one of the most common causes of stress in adults. Neglecting to care for yourself financially can quickly spiral into a larger issue. Before you know it, you can’t sleep at night because you’re so stressed about money.

Take the time to organize your finances each month. How much do you need for bills, how much do you need for groceries? And don’t forget to carve out a budget for the things you care about, like a travel fund or a weekly night out budget. You don’t need money to be happy, but you do need to take care of your finances in order to take care of yourself.

5. Hit The Gym

Sweating at the gym isn’t necessarily attractive, but it’s important for your all-around well being. For both your physical and mental health, hitting the gym is important. Burning calories and releasing endorphins feels good. Not to mental regular exercise is a great way to boost creativity, productivity, and self-esteem. It’s a double-whammy

You don’t need to be a weightlifting champion or total gym rat, but you should consider physical activity if you’re thinking about self-care. Even if you go for a walk around the block a few times a week, that time is great for your mind, your body, and your spirit.

6. Surround Yourself With Good People

Negative people will always have a negative impact on your life. It’s sometimes a hard fact to accept. If the people you engage with don’t leave you feeling good about yourself, it might be time to find a new group of friends. There’s one self-care tip that many people avoid, and that’s removing negative people from your life and surrounding yourself with positive ones. It’s hard but necessary for your own self-care journey.

The concept is pretty simple. In order to care for yourself, you need to be around people who care about you (and themselves as well). Negative people lead to negative thoughts, emotions, and activity, harming you in one way or another. Avoid the heartache and be with good people.

7. Remember Hobbies

In many ways, self-care is about prioritizing the things you enjoy. When you don’t make time for things or activities that make you happy, you’ll find yourself in a really negative headspace. Shaping a life that includes hobbies or pastimes is important. It allows you to recharge mentally, and creates a safe place for yourself to retreat to when you need “self-care time.” As our lives get busier, it’s easy to forget about our hobbies, but for your own wellbeing, make them a priority.

Everyone’s hobbies are different. Just because a friend or loved one enjoys one activity, doesn’t mean you have to. In many cases, hobbies are things we enjoy doing in solitude. So whether it’s sitting down with a book, or going for a bike ride, giving yourself the time to enjoy what makes you happy is caring for yourself.

8. Get Yourself Outdoors

Being outdoors is an amazing feeling both mentally & physically. Get yourself out & about, read a book at a park, go for a walk along the beach.

People who work in offices during the week tend to love the outdoors on the weekends.

I know this is most certainly me – I love being outdoors on the weekend.

9. Talk To Yourself With Love

Self-care isn’t just physical activity, like going to the gym or eating healthy. It’s also how you think of and speak to yourself. If your head is constantly flooded with negative thoughts, you’ll start to experience side effects, like poor self-esteem or self-image. You need to see yourself and speak to yourself with love and respect. You can’t be your own worst enemy, you need to be your number one fan. Self-care and self-love are two sides of the same coin.

When you start to think negative thoughts, quickly replace them with positive ones. This takes a conscious effort and control on your part, but it’s important. See the good instead of the bad, even if you need to say it to yourself again and again. Say it out loud if you have to. In the wise words of RuPaul, “if you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

10. Find the Time For Self-Care

Last but not least, make the time for self-care. In all honestly, self-care isn’t easy. It takes time, effort, healing, forgiveness, understanding, acceptance, honesty, support, and faith to accomplish. But step number one is finding the time.

Don’t let yourself get “too busy” and stop creating excuses. If you’re not happy, not feeling fulfilled, hating yourself…it’s your job to make a change. Give yourself all of the time and resources you need to make self-care a priority. You may not realize it’s importance, but as your life and views start to change, you’ll see why it matters.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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