This Is For You

groovy days

Hello loves, ❤

This is for the person with anxiety. For the one with dry eyes and big dreams and a relentless spirit. For the one that is their own worst enemy and their only friend. For the one that reading this has felt the tremor of every fleeting emotion and yet, feels nothing at all.

For the one that yearns to fill their days with explosions of love, hurricanes of passion and a rainfall of peace. For the one that knows that it doesn’t matter how slowly you go as long as you don’t stop, but how much longer and will they ever get there?

This is for the person whose pulse sometimes feels like a rocket headed for space but trapped in their body. The one that feels the vibration of every noise with every fiber of their being and it hurts, but they trusts that one day their body will learn— the danger is gone.

This is for the person that has spent too many a day on a battlefield with their thoughts — running away from them or tirelessly accepting, making promises or greeting threats.

Who has always taken a double portion of responsibility and twice the guilt because they live life in parallel. A life of endless dilemmas that tear you apart; a part of you is here but the other always somewhere far away in the realm of better possibilities.

This is for the person that sometimes feels utter exhaustion without having done a thing at all, because that’s what living in their head feels like.

For the one that has used up all of their energy to try and remain calm, and is now angry because they got mountains to climb, rivers to swim in and rainbows to walk over.

For the person that has tossed and turned and tossed and turned and there isn’t a cold corner of their bedsheets left that they can cling to. For the person who has jiggled with the threat of death in their head, while their body has faithfully carried on with the day.

For the person that is small and tiny but is actually a kingdom for three: their fear, their thoughts and their loving heart. And to the one that has spent most of their days trying to make it a harmonious trio.

For the person that knows this to be true, but refuses it to see it as a sad story. For they are not a victim. But is grateful instead for their chance to grow and become their own master. They still feel the bliss in every day and slows down to smell the roses. They never forget to thank God for every waking day. Yes, to you I want to say— I see you, I feel you, I believe in you.

Your darkness is my light. The places that scare you, the situations that dare you, they glare you. They make you real and living and true. How you build yourself over and over again, with the rise of dawn every morning despite what the night had brought, how you keep trying to accept yourself despite the voices that tell you, you are hard to love. How you hope against hope, and hold tight and always breathe new life to your extinguished fire — that to me is beauty and meaning and strength. You are the first star to appear оn the night sky and defy the darkness, you are the pearl oyster covered in stardust in the debris of the sea, you are the graceful ballerina that keeps on dancing on a tightrope despite her pain.

You know not what you do, but trust me if there is one thing that brings light to this world, it is you.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

Coping With Anxiety & Insecurities In Relationships

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Hello loves, ❤

 “Avoiding overthinking and jumping to conclusions could be the key to overcoming your relationship anxiety”

I can tell you for sure that being in a relationship can make us feel vulnerable and emotionally exposed. I had always been prone to stress and doubt and it still manifests when I’m not mindful of it.

This isn’t a strange phenomenon for people who have been hurt in the past or have had love addiction or anxiety issues in the past. Relationship anxiety can be very hard to deal with when let to build up to a certain level. In a generally healthy relationship, you’ll want to learn how to deal with relationship anxiety if you’re prone to it.

1. Review and note potential causes.

Relationships are like the wave concept in physics; they have peaks and troughs. It’s normal to have issues in a healthy relationship from time to time, and you should aim to resolve these hiccups in a respectful and gentle manner.

The problems you might be dealing with might be related to money, jealousy, doubt, and fear of abandonment. When there’s a loss of trust, a feeling of walking on eggshells, long-term stress, or excessive negativity, your relationship can feel challenging, leading to anxiety. If potential causes like these exist and compound your anxiety, you might want to seek professional help to navigate your way out of it.

2. This is hard but avoid jumping to conclusions.

You have to be mature enough to admit that the problem could be imaginary and due to your own over-thinking. Be realistic about what you can really sense in your partner. Don’t be quick to assume the worst. If you have doubts, be proactive and communicate with your partner.

When your partner talks about their feelings, be receptive and open to what they’re saying. Avoid jumping to conclusions about what they’re trying to communicate to you. Don’t imagine you understand everything about your partner’s gender and categorize their expressions or emotions in a box of your gender or personality assumptions. Do not assume any negative feelings are because of you.

3. Accept there are no perfect relationships.

Every relationship has its issues and you won’t always be in the same mindset or emotional state as your partner. It took me a while to actually accept this. I always expected my partners to give me at least 80% of themselves daily. I started having doubts whenever they couldn’t give me what I thought I wanted.

In a bid to not appear demanding, I would compel myself to give at least 80% of myself every day too, even when I knew I didn’t just have that energy level. I was on constant emotional burnout and it compounded my anxiety.

I didn’t let my partners go through their phases of life because I didn’t know if I could even be there for them. Letting yourself be natural and transparent about when you can’t give your maximum level of emotional energy helps you see the humanness of your partner too. Their decision to still stick with you and stay really sweet to you even on their low days is where the love is.

4. Recognize that relationships are different.

Having problematic relationships in the past make you distrustful of your current partner, but it’s important to realize that every relationship is different. Avoid bringing feelings from your past relationship into a current one. Recognize that your partner is a different person, with different motivations, fears and attributes. Let a past relationship go so its shadow doesn’t hang over a current one.

5. Affirm the positives.

We can sometimes focus too much on the negatives and forget the qualities we love in our partners. Instead of dwelling on negatives, take regular time-outs to celebrate the good things in your relationship. Focus on what you love about your partner and the things he or she does for you. Concentrating on the positives can make you feel more secure and allow you to fully feel the love your partner has for you.

6. Seek security in yourself.

I worked hard to rebuild my self-confidence which I realized was a powerful way to counter anxiety in a relationship. You don’t have to give your partner all the responsibility for your happiness, take some of it back and become more self-assured. This can lighten the pressure on your partner and reduce relationship tension.

7. Connect with your partner.

I learned from experience that you sometimes actually have to ask your partner to make an effort to connect and communicate with you. We’re all very different people and we may not really know one another’s commitment style. I’ve learned that you actually have to ask for a lot of things in a healthy relationship.

Asking does not mean that your relationship is falling apart, it just means that you and your partner are different individuals looking to share genuine intimacy and bond. If you’re encountering challenges in your relationship, one strategy to take is to start over anew. Clear old out emotions and perceptions and start dating as if you have just met. From here you could rebuild and rediscover the trust you had.

Connecting with your partner can also mean exchanging needs. Sit down and have a discussion about what each partner needs from the relationship. Work from your lists to do the best you can to satisfy each other’s needs.

Physical affection is also important for re-engaging with your partner. Touching, holding, and otherwise showing physical affection could help you recreate your connection and strengthen your trust to reduce anxiety.

Other ways to minimize anxiety are practicing mindfulness and targeting anxiety with stress busters (meditation, exercise, subtle social activities, long walks, and living in the present).

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

Jenolan State Forest

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Hello loves, ❤

I hope you’re all well 🙂 It’s Wednesday here in Sydney, Australia & its a sunny day but VERY cold. Haha, us Australians think 15 degrees is cold, whereby some countries think 15 degrees is HOT. (I am talking celsius)

How was every ones weekend? I went about 3 hours away to Jenolan State Forest, this area is known for caving etc but we went into the forest section & was driving through there. We also went to for a lovely long hike to a suspension bridge & faced a few fears 🙂

I got a lot of steps on my Fitbit that day (Speaking of Fitbit, thank you to those that have added me on Fitbit & have been doing challenges with me, I am having so much fun doing this, it is also very motivating)

We then came back to the campaign ground & had some lunch (We brought some food from home to make our own sandwiches, which was yummy)

On the way out of the forest, we took another exit, as the mountain got higher, the temperature was dropping which meant… IT SNOWED! Now, I have never seen snow fall from the sky, only ever seen it already fallen onto the ground, so it was an AMAZING experience to see it fall from the sky.

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^ This is the amazing clan I went with 🙂 From left to right is, me (hi), Jamie (Sister fiances brother), Archel (Sister fiances brothers wife), Tiarna (sister) & Dean (Sister’s fiance)

^ This is a video of the snow falling from the sky 🙂 I absolutely loved it.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

 

Blueberry Muffins Recipe

scar wilde

Hello loves, ❤

If you’ve been following me for a while you’ll know that I’ve introduced BAKING into my life as it is so therapeutic & everyone around me has been loving the goodies I’ve been making.

Below is the recipe from Betty Crocker’s Blue Berry Muffins

You will need:

  • Betty Crocker Blueberry Muffin Mix
  • 1 egg
  • 180ml water

Let’s Get Started:

  1. Preheat oven to 180 degrees then put the mix, egg & water into a mixing bowl & mix away.
  2. When the mixture has all combined & is a smooth consistency, start filling your muffin patties 1/3 to the top.
  3. Pop in the oven for 15-20 mins (My trick it to keep an eye on them at 15 mins as you don’t want them to get dry, take them out when the top of the muffin springs back)
  4. Once they are ready, pop them onto a cooling rack & let them cool.

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This is so easy & simple, & EVERYONE WILL LOVE THEM!

Once they were cooled, I ate 3 straight away 😛

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature