Being An Overthinker!

Being An Overthinker!

Hello loves,

If over thinking was a sport – I would get the GOLD MEDAL every time!

Overthinking isn’t just asking yourself if you left the back door open.

Overthinking can easily become an obsessive behavior, linked with anxiety, depression, and a handful of other mental illnesses. It’s subconscious, and for the most part, an overthinker doesn’t even realize they’re over thinking – it’s just how their mind works.

For overthinkers, one of the biggest struggles is explaining to people what you’re overthinking about or why you’re behaving the way you are. Because from the outside looking in, it might not be obvious.  

Here are some things people don’t realize you’re doing because you’re an overthinker:

1. Avoiding Conflict As Much As Possible

Overthinkers don’t like conflict. Not with themselves, not with the people around them, not anywhere. Conflict causes anxiety, it leads to questions, worries, concerns, fears… It makes overthinkers extremely uncomfortable because it gives them something to overthink about. So, if you’re wondering why someone shuts down the second a conflict arises, it might be because they’re an overthinker and it’s just too much. BUT THEN… Also, the questions & thoughts cause conflict.

2. Fidgeting

When your mind is racing with thoughts, sometimes your body tries to keep up. You feel like you need to move. This can lead to fidgeting, tapping, humming, hair twirling, and a bunch of other psychical manifestations. It’s one response to overthinking that can be seen from the outside in.

3. Asking Too Many Questions

It’s harder to overthink things when you know all the facts. That’s why overthinkers are constantly asking questions. Because if they know all the facts, there’s less to worry or think about.

4. Religiously Sticking to Plans

Overthinkers like to have a plan set out. In their head, they’re thinking about every aspect of this plan. Every detail needs to run through their brain so they can evaluate risks, reduce stress, and make sure everything runs as smoothly as possible. That’s why they tend to panic or get visibly upset when plans change. Try to understand this is hard for them.

5. Writing Things Down

Often times, writing things down is the only way to get things off their mind. Even if just for a little while. Overthinkers will make lists, mark things on calendars, and schedule out their days as best as they can. It’s on behavior that helps keep thoughts from taking over.

6. Apologizing, Constantly

I’m sorry for saying sorry so much, but it’s something overthinkers do on a regular basis. It’s because they worry, constantly, that someone might be upset, disappointed, angry, or annoyed, even if there’s no reason for it. And there’s no other logical thing for them to do but say sorry. They just want things to be better so they can stop thinking about it.

7. Overreacting To Nothing

Not all overthinkers overreact, but it’s a pretty common trend. It stems from insecurity, worry, and a desire for everything to be perfect. And when it’s not, there can be a bit of an explosion of emotion. We’re not doing it intentionally, it’s almost like a defense mechanism.

8. Obsessively Googling Things

Feeling sick? Stressing about the weather? Planning a trip? There’s a 100% chance you’re Googling everything about it until you’ve read every page on the Internet. Why? Because overthinkers need answers. They want reassurance that everything is fine, so they can stop obsessing over it and try to move on. The good news is, they’re usually experts on a number of illnesses or natural disasters.

9. Creeping Social Media Like The FBI

People who overthink constantly jump to the worst-case scenario. Logical thinking gets thrown to the wind. So if we need information to put our thoughts at ease, we’re turning to social media like a pro. This stems from insecurity or the idea that something is wrong, sometimes even FOMO (fear of missing out). Regardless, social media allows us to try and validate our thoughts, or put them to rest.

10. Always Looking for Hidden Messages

For the most part, people say what they mean. If they’re tired, they’ll let you know. But for an overthinker, everything has to be a cryptic message. If a text doesn’t have a happy face, they must be mad. If they don’t smile at you, they hate you. If you’re not invited, it’s because you’re a loser. Overthinkers will obsess over everything, trying to find the “true meaning” when in fact, there isn’t one.

11. Seeking Reassurance

Being an overthinker is hard. You’re constantly worried things are wrong. You fear you’re not good enough. It’s hard to decipher reality from imagination. This leads overthinkers to seek validation or reassurance. They need to be told things because they won’t assume them on their own. So if you love an overthinker, tell them! If you know someone is feeling insecure, offer them reassurance. It’s not hard to make them feel comfortable in their own head.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

DYH Signature

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46 thoughts on “Being An Overthinker!

  1. This post is literally me in a nutshell! It’s so exhausting being an over thinker and so hard to break that habit which has formed over so many years. This is one of my “mental health” goals this year to just CHILL and stop dwelling on every little thing.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Loved this so much – just resonated with me and made me rethink something I thought I knew about myself. I’ve used this to reflect on myself and put this up on my blog page – with clear links to your original document and clear acknowledgment of the impact this had on me. So please take a look and see if you’re happy with the way I’ve used this … the process was so helpful for me … but feel free to ask me to remove, change or clarify links in anyway you feel appropriate.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. On the flip side, I think over thinkers are more perceptive of other peoples thoughts and feelings. They spend a lot of time studying people, considering why they responded or did not respond a certain way. I do agree however, that it can become exhausting and all consuming. If only we could tame the beast!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Yes you’re absolutely right! It’s almost a blessing and a curse…I think one of the things my friends all value in me is my empathy and open-mindedness to whatever they’re feeling or struggling with, I do believe I can credit my overthinking to that because like you say, over thinkers are indeed very perceptive of others emotions!

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Preach! Overthinking is so mentally gruelling- I have done it my whole life and while I have improved (I have stopped questioning why I overthink and just accept what I’m feeling, which is still difficult bit certainly helps!). However, this year I am constantly overthinking when it comes to friends not answering my message the same day I contact them…I assume I’ve upset them or they’re icing me out over something offensive that I may have said…then I get a normal text back and I feel relief but whilst waiting for the text my mind creates an infinite amount of negative scenarios as to why they haven’t returned my text

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I relate so much to this! Once I went away for the weekend, and even though I had checked it a couple of times, I spent the whole time obsessing about whether or not I had left a candle burning. Overthinking is the worst! It’s just exhausting

    Liked by 1 person

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