Forgive, But Don’t Forget

Forgive, But Don't Forget

Hello loves, ❤

Forgiving someone is a BIG thing! It can be miscommunicated & the person can think it’s okay to do these tings again bc you forgive them so easily.

I believe forgiving someone can remove the burden from yourself however, I personally don’t forget. I don’t forget the way the person made me feel 😦

Below are some pointers on forgiving someone ❤

1. Stop actively trying to forgive them.

2. If it was just words that hurt you, figure out why you were triggered to fear they were true. That’s what you’re here to resolve.

3. Wish them joy and wellness – not because they deserve it, but because you don’t deserve to live with the burden of their mistakes forever.

4. Be the bigger person and try to imagine what wounds made them act the way they did.

5. Make a long list of the ways that you are a better person because you had to adapt in the face of adversity, and it made you wiser, stronger and more determined to build a better life for yourself.

6. If that person is no longer in your life, consider that their loss was not a punishment, rather, a form of protection.

7. Realize that people don’t always come into our lives to love us. Half of them come into our lives to show us to ourselves, to slowly make us into the people we need to be for the ones who will be with us forever.

8. Be honest about whether or not you contributed to whatever happened between you.

9. If you’re not responsible for any of it, accept that their actions are out of your control, but what you can change is how you respond to them.

10. If you are responsible for some part of it, forgive yourself, and watch your resentment toward them slowly disappear.

11. Stop trying to create a more just world by hanging onto your injustices. Showing the world how much pain you are in will not convince it to retract the circumstances it handed you and make them right. That part is up to you.

12. Stop thinking more about what you know you’ve lost as opposed to what you don’t yet know you will gain.

13. Consider that this type of hardship and struggle has impacted basically every single person ever alive and that though its commonality won’t ease the pain, remembering that you are not alone and that you are not the only person to ever go through this will.

14. When the world hurts you, do the thing that most people are not big enough to do and imagine how you can possibly contribute to making it better, rather than being a victim for the rest of your life.

15. Be still and let every wave of emotion pass over you. Let it cleanse you and then let it tell you what you need to do next.

16. Get better at speaking up for yourself. Tell someone when they are being rude. Tell someone when you’re upset. So much of our inability to forgive comes from our inability to correct the situation when we actually have the power to.

17. Get better at disconnecting. You don’t have to be friends with everyone, certainly not anyone who’s hurt you in any significant way.

18. Take all of the anger that is still coursing through you and channel it toward building a new life. Living well is not the best revenge, it’s the only revenge that’s worth anything.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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I Care About My Loved Ones More Than I Care About Myself

alexis finnegan

Hello loves, ❤

I care about my loved ones more than I care about myself. I will not bat a single eyelash if you insult me, if you treat me like I am lesser, if you put me through hell — but if I find out you have been even slightly rude to someone I care about, I am going to make you regret that decision. I am going to hold an everlasting grudge against you. I am going to expect an apology, but even that will not be enough to satisfy my bloodlust.

I can handle heartache. But if you break the heart of someone I hold dear, then you are dead to me.

I care about my loved ones more than I care about myself. I will do anything for them. I will splurge on surprises for them, but I will feel bad about buying anything expensive for myself. I will encourage them to visit the doctor when they feel under the weather, but I will procrastinate when it comes to getting checkups myself. I don’t take care of my body as much as I should. I don’t care about myself the way I should.

I put all of my love into other people.

I will never choose the restaurant I want to visit or the music I want to play. I choose what I think will make the people around me the most excited. I put their wants before my own. Making them happy makes me happy.

I have trouble convincing myself that I deserve kindness and respect, but I know damn well what my loved ones deserve. They deserve to feel safe. Supported. Inspired. Loved. They deserve the world.

If you are someone I care about, then I am going to make you a priority. I am going to help you whenever you call out for me. I am going to be there no matter what. I will never let you down.

I care about my loved ones more than I care about myself. I would go miles out of my way for them. I would sacrifice my happiness for them. I would make myself miserable for them.

My soft heart has caused me to get taken advantage of in the past. I have given others love they never deserved. I have put in effort for people who refused to meet me halfway. I have been used. I have had my heart shattered.

Some people say I am too nice, but I cannot help myself. I have trouble spoiling myself, but it’s so easy to spoil other people. It’s so easy to make them the first and last thoughts of my day. I am a people pleaser. I am not comfortable unless everyone else in the room is comfortable first.

I care about my loved ones more than I care about myself — and I know that is my biggest strength and my biggest weakness. It is what brings me the most joy and the most stress.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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How To Get What You Want, Based On The Law of Attraction

How To Get What You Want, Based On The Law Of Attraction

Hello loves, ❤

Maybe you’re worried about where your job will lead you in the next year, and you want to start planning every last concrete detail. Or, maybe you’re wondering if you should be looking for a new job, and you’re completely stressed out about what that job would be, and if it would be better than your current job. Maybe you’ve even filled out 15 job applications, and have a pro and con list for each job already created prior to hearing anything out from the jobs. And maybe all of this job searching is completely drawing your attention away from a possible job advancement at your current career (that could actually be wonderful for you).

Or, perhaps you’re concerned about when your boyfriend will finally move in with you, and you want to nail down the date 10 months in advance so you can start thinking of exactly when and where you’ll be moving. Does this sound familiar to you? We all get caught up in future tripping because we all want to have concrete plans. We all want to be certain of timelines, details, and solutions so that we have control over what is going to happen in our life.

And to be honest, we all crave control. When things aren’t going our way, our instinct is to fix them. We want power over what happens so that we are reassured that we know what we are doing. Even when things are going well, we want to have the final say. We want to micromanage the situation because if we don’t, we fear what may happen. Leaving things up to the universe can feel too risky and too anxiety provoking. We want to have the power to create the solution, so we try to take over. And we tend to get so stuck in the future or so stuck in the details that we often get let down when things change, or when we don’t get what we want.

So what would you think if I said that if you loosen your grasp on the reigns just a little bit, the solution will come to you? I know, it sounds like BS. But it’s actually the truth. You see, what you want is out there, and what you want is actually attracted to you. If you want something badly enough, you can draw it in…you can get it.

Say what? All of this has to do with the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction is a universal principle that essentially explains that like attracts like.

So basically, you can attract positive experiences into your life. You can attract what you desire. You can attract what you want and turn it into reality. You can be the co-creator, the co-writer of your life. You just have to be more open to possibilities, and open to good things happening to you. It’s kind of a law of optimism in some ways. See, if you don’t open your mind up to the possibility that good things may come your way, you’ll miss out on opportunities because you won’t be looking for them. Or if you don’t believe you deserve good things, you won’t notice them when they present themselves. Conversely, if you are expecting good things to come your way, you will see the opportunities and chase them. You’ll see steps that you can take to get you to where you want to be. And the truth of the matter is, people who are optimistic tend to have more success. And thus, the Law of Attraction is actually based in science. Many studies prove that our thoughts have tangible and immediate impacts on our environments and on ourselves.

So here’s the thing. Rather than putting your energy into wanting something specific, you should instead use your energy to seek the feeling that you desire.

If you want love, don’t just focus on one specific person who doesn’t seem to be interested in you. Look at love on a larger scale. What does love feel like? If you seek the feeling rather than the concrete thing or person, you will have much better luck in fulfilling your desire because your heart will be open to more opportunities. The universe can then help you pull in the love that you are attracting because like attracts like.

And if you want to dive deeper into the law, attracting what you desire can also be explained in terms of energy. As the inspirational guru, Gabby Bernstein, said, “We’re all beings of energy. When our energy vibrates at a low level, we attract low-level circumstances. But when our energy is in a high vibration we attract positive outcomes.” So like energy attracts like energy. If we use our manifesting power to seek confidence, love, and joy, like will attract like, and we will receive positive energy back from the universe.

So basically, what you can take away from the Law of Attraction is that the universe is actually on your side, and you can attract whatever it is that you want.

But what you have to do is attract the feeling, rather than the concrete “solution,” and keep your mind open to opportunities that may present themselves, even if these opportunities are subtle or hidden. This allows you to loosen up on the control, and instead be open to the feelings you are drawn towards. It allows you to see yourself living in abundance. It allows you to see your own greatness, and to feel optimistic that what you seek is also seeking you.

It’s important to remember that what you want may not come to you in the way you anticipated it would, so keep your mind open. You will actually attract something greater than what you anticipated because the universe knows what you need. The universe has your back. And because of this, you have to learn to surrender to the universe and surrender to faith. Rather than trying to control every component of your life, try to draw in and create the feelings you crave and desire.

Allow the universe to be on your side. Let go of the control, and focus on what you value and what you deserve.

You deserve to wake up in a good mood when your alarm clock goes off in the morning. You deserve to go to a job that sparks your heart or your mind; a job that helps you to feel at home. You deserve to be complete and whole all on your own. And when you’re ready for love, you deserve a love that lifts you higher, a love that compliments you rather than completes you. A love that helps you to fall in love with yourself first.

And you can attract all of these things. I promise.

They say that patience is a virtue. But if you know that so much goodness is out there waiting for you, seeking you, you’ll be okay with patience. You’ll be okay with waiting because you will already know what the outcome will be. You create your own reality. So remember how you wish to feel, and how you deserve to feel. Remember that the positive energy you send out will come back to you. Like attracts like. What you seek is seeking you.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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Is This You?

boating

Hello loves, ❤

Is this you? I sure know that THIS IS ME!

I do not love my self enough & this is something I am most certainly working on.

Let me know if you can relate to the below:

1. You delete posts after uploading them. If your selfie doesn’t get enough likes on Instagram, then you delete the photo because you start second-guessing whether you actually looked as good as you originally thought. You need validation from others in order to feel good about yourself.

2. You keep falling for toxic people. You have been stuck in one-sided relationships before. Relationships where you were always the one sending the first text and setting plans, even though you barely got any attention in return. You keep settling for the wrong people because your standards are low. You don’t realize what you deserve yet.

3. You blame yourself for everything. If someone leaves you, you assume you did something to chase them away. If someone takes too long to text you back, you assume you were annoying them with your attention. You always think you’re the one to blame because you are insecure about who you are inside.

4. You put other people on pedestals. There are certain friends and celebrities you wish you were more like. You wish you had their hair, their body, their smile, their life. You consider them superior to you, because you don’t see how much you have to offer.

5. You are terrified of rejection. It’s rare for you to make the first move when it comes to asking someone out on a date because you assume they are going to say no. You assume they are going to break your heart. It’s hard for you to believe someone could actually have feelings for you, because you only see yourself as a bother.

6. You hate spending time alone. You always want to be surrounded by others because you are uncomfortable being left alone. You don’t want extra time to think about all of the ways you have screwed up in the past and to worry about what might happen in the future. To you, time alone means time to overthink.

7. You put others before yourself. You will go out of your way to help your friends and family. You will do whatever it takes to bring them happiness. But you never stop to ask yourself what you really want because you value their opinions over your own.

8. You give up easily. You don’t believe in your own abilities. You don’t think you have what it takes to make it. You assume you are going to fail, you assume there is no point in trying, so you give up before giving yourself a fighting chance.

9. You assume bad thing are going to happen to you. You feel like the world is against you. You feel like you are always going to be miserable, so you don’t even try to change your luck. You don’t love yourself enough to make an effort to find your path.

10. You are overly competitive. You hate people who are more successful than you, prettier than you, or smarter than you. You feel like their accomplishments make yours less special. You are always comparing yourself to someone else because ‘beating them’ is the only way you feel better about yourself.

11. You avoid photographs. Whenever your friends want to snap a group photo, you volunteer to hold the camera. And whenever you take a selfie, you use a snapchat filter because it’s the only way you feel pretty.

12. You neglect your health. You procrastinate making doctor appointments. You go days without showering and let your roots grow out and let your nails turn yellow, because you couldn’t care less about pampering yourself. You never make yourself a priority.

13. You criticize yourself every single day. You cannot glance in the mirror without mentioning how messy your hair looks or how dry your skin feels or how much weight you have gained lately. You always have something negative to say about yourself and never anything positive.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

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