Anxiety in Relationships

Anxiety tells you that something is inherently wrong with you daily.

How can you expect anyone else to understand you if I don’t even understand yourself? Society throws around the term “anxiety” as if it’s something we all share and must all learn how to overcome. What most people are generally dealing with is stress, not anxiety. Stress creeps into your life as a result of looming deadlines, problems that need addressed, and the constant state of busyness we all live in today. Stress usually ends once those stressors are addressed and handled. Anxiety is a constant state of worry that convinces you everything is going wrong. It overthinks, over questions, and over analyzes to the point that no productivity can be achieved.

When you have generalized anxiety, you wake up every day fighting a battle that people without anxiety will never understand. Some days are easier than others. It is especially exhausting in close relationships, especially for loved ones who don’t struggle with anxiety themselves. They become more like therapists than friends and your anxiety will tell you that they love you less because of it. In romantic relationships, the anxiety monster will always be ready to convince you that everything is going terrible.

Here are five lies anxiety will tell you about your relationship:

1. Anxiety tells you the entire relationship is one-sided. If you partner doesn’t reassure you regularly, you become convinced that they don’t care about you or the relationship at all. Most of the time, you are able to recognize that these thoughts must not be true. You’ll try to reassure yourself that your partner would not be dating you if they did not care about you deeply. Despite your best efforts, the racing thoughts continue.

2. Anxiety tells you that your partner isn’t interested in your life. It is normal for relationships to ebb and flow. For people with anxiety, the ebbs become debilitating. You start to question every text message, the frequency of phone calls, how many words of affection your partner is using or not using, etc. It is exhausting for you, so you know it must be exhausting for your partner. This will cause you more anxiety.

3. Anxiety tells you that you will never be deserving of happiness. In fact, when you feel overwhelming happiness in a relationship, you start bracing yourself for the next fight. You’ll start picking apart every conversation convinced that there must be some reason your partner is working so hard to appear happy. In reality, your partner has told you multiple times that you need to recognize it’s okay to be happy. The universe is not actually working against you.

4. Anxiety tells you that you will never find true love. Even if you’re in a healthy, happy relationship, anxiety tells you that it will most certainly end. It tells you that when it does end, it will definitely be all your fault and that you will be alone forever. You may even have pity parties for yourself thinking about the lifetime of loneliness definitely waiting ahead in your future.

5. Anxiety tells you the reason your  relationship will fail because of your anxiety. A loving partner will work to understand the source of your anxieties in relationships. If you are with someone who truly supports you, they will be patient with you as you work towards a secure bond with them. If not, you are better off if they leave. Some people are not equipped to deal with issues other than their own. If you are in a relationship with an unsupportive partner, while also dealing with anxiety, you have a recipe for disaster. Just remember, your anxiety does not define you. No matter how many lies anxiety tries to tell you, know that you are always deserving of love and happiness.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

A, x (1)

It Took 2 Days (21,000 Views)

Good morning everyone 🙂

Another morning that I sit at my work desk, go through my emails, reply to comments, read some inspiring blog posts.

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There has been some back burning in Sydney, Australia in preparation for the hot summer we will have this year – so there is A LOT of smoke happening where I am, the smell of smoke is everywhere, in your house, in the office, on your clothes etc – can’t shake the smell.

Another 1000 view to add to our view calculator, we are now sitting on 21,000 & I couldn’t be more grateful for all the support, views, comments & love from each & every one of you.

Thank you to those that have started emailing me + have become e-pals w/ me ❤ Wohoo, it’s been a pleasure talking to all of you, can’t wait to make more e-pal friends ❤

We are now on Day 14 of the 21 Day Self Care Challenge, hope everyone is going well w/ this ❤

I know that Gail from Gail Loves God is doing a TREMENDOUS job at this self care challenge, she blogs daily about what she’s been up to.

I am so grateful for those that are doing this challenge, + keeping up to date. be sure to let me know if you are doing this challenge + have been blogging about it ❤

Yesterdays challenge was about friendship + making sure we are surrounded by people that bring a positive vibe to our lives.

Gail mentioned something very lovely in regards to gaining a new friend ❤

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^ To have someone write such beautiful words about me brings tears yet smiles to my face. I cannot believe that people on the other side of the world read my blog, acknowledge my posts than also take the time to write such beautiful posts about me.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

A, x (1)

Self Care Challenge Day 14: Treat Day

21 Day Self Care Challenge - Day Fourteen

Hey lovely person!

It’s day 14, and you know what that means – you’ve completed 2 weeks of self care! So that’s 2 weeks of focusing on yourself and your needs and prioritising yourself.

I am so proud of you! Because every time you do something that’s about your own well being, it makes you more confident, raises your self esteem, reduces stress and that has an overall, cumulative effect on how you see yourself.

Grab your journal + lets reflect on the below:

  • What’s been your fave task
  • What have you learned about yourself
  • How you are feeling

Today is treat day! To celebrate your accomplishment, today you are going to give yourself a treat.

There are 2 ways of doing this: one includes spending some money and one doesn’t.

  • Buy yourself a treat. It doesn’t have to be expensive – flowers, a new lipstick, a book from your reading wish list. If you can spare more money, a massage, a manicure etc is wonderful.
  • Treat yourself to an activity that doesn’t cost anything – visit a friend for a catch up, take a walk somewhere beautiful, a cycle ride, visit a gallery or museum – take a nap!

Small or large, do something today you wouldn’t usually do, and enjoy!

Stay tuned for Day 15.

Wherever you are in the world, have a lovely day ❤

A, x (1)